Let’s Go To College!

Yeah, let’s go to college!

Let’s study useless majors.
Let’s re-live Animal House.
Let’s stand or walk in the street like a dumbass with a perfectly good sidewalk on at least one side.
Let’s kick cars that almost hit us because we’re standing or walking in the street like a dumbass.
Let’s walk out in front of cars whether we’re in a crosswalk or not.
Let’s call a taxi when we’re not ready for it.
Let’s stand in the street like a dumbass while we talk to our dumbass friends.
Let’s hail a taxi when we don’t need one.
Let’s hail a taxi when we aren’t ready for it.
Let’s get the taxi driver a ticket for impeding traffic waiting for us.
Let’s run on a taxi fare.
Let’s turn over recycling bins and let bottles roll into the street to cut tires on cars that pass.
Let’s walk up to a cab with no yellow on it anywhere, and ask if they are with Yellow Cab.
Let’s walk up to a bright yellow Crown Victoria with lettering that says, “Yellow Cab”, and ask if they are with Yellow Cab.
Let’s bring a car to college that costs twice what some locals make in the town we are a guest in.
Let’s have no sense of humor.
Let’s drive like idiots because we’re from out of town.
Let’s disrespect anyone and everyone in the town we are a guest in.
Let’s act as though we own the town we are a guest in.
Let’s treat everyone else as an inferior.
Let’s break state law by carrying alcohol out of a bar and into a vehicle.
Let’s talk shit to cops because Mom and Dad pay for us to go to school here.
Let’s murder someone and be out of jail in five years because we go to college here.
Let’s be an asshole.

Yeah, let’s go to college. We need higher education for the rite of passage to do all these cool things.

Boy, am I glad I didn't finish college!